dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize
