brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Randomize
