Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Randomize
