Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
It's shark week go big or go home
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
