4 words: hood of his car
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
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