I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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