They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
Randomize
