i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Randomize
