the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize