but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize
