she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Randomize
