Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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