so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Randomize
