the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
