maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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