just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
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