There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Randomize
