Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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