Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
