In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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