I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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