I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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