I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
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