She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
