Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Shame - the story of my life.
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