I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
