Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize