Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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