When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
