My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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