i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I think we might need a safe word for this...
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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