It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
