didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Randomize
