answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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