nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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