Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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