Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
