so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Randomize
