The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
