No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
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