Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize