I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
