i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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