my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
