it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
