Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I just had sex on a roof
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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