so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
