saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Randomize
