I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
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