yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
