The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
