I got chris browned last night
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize